As I wait for my sleeping bugz to wake up on this sunny birthday afternoon, I have to admit that I still have a little bit of guilt about staying home with them!! I know that my bugz have to come first before work, and that kids get sick, but it was (and still is!) really freakin’ hard for me to put that into action today.
I’ve never been a person to let my kids hold me back, regardless of whether it was a smart choice. I’ve never used my kids as an excuse for being late, or for not committing to something. Yes, there have been times that I’ve had to decline invitations because of my kids, but on the whole I try to be a responsible parenting adult and make my life fit around their needs and vice versa. _uacct = “UA-4888259-1″;urchinTracker();
It drives me crazy when people use their kids as a result for poor performance, lazy behaviours and disorganization. I’ll own up to still having mommy-brain, but I also own up to the fact that it’s my own fault when it does rear it’s ugly, forgetful head. I’m kind of a hard-azz like that…
So when Jessica and Liesa stepped up to reassure me that I could stay home and the sky would not cave in, it meant the world to me. I can’t explain to you how much anxiety it gave me to even broach the subject. I tossed and turned all night, feeling like a total flake. After all, I’d committed to working full time, and our jobs are not the kind that can just be made up for the next day. There are people who have scheduled their days around me being at the studio, and they’ve paid good money for that experience. It’s my responsibility to them to show up and teach, and to have all my ducks in a row ahead of time.
I hated calling in sick. But my two friends held me up and covered my class today, and gently told me that it was okay to be a mom first. I still feel guilty, but I also feel so incredibly grateful to work alongside two women who understand what it’s like to have a family who needs you to be more than a paycheque some days. I know that one little blog post won’t sum up how much it meant to have their support today, but I hope from the bottom of my heart that they know that they helped me grow a lot today as a mom.
Thanks ladies – you are two in a million, and I love ya!